Leverage and Purpose

Hello Everyone!

I apologize for slacking here. Life has delt some tough ones lately and my family is going through some transition. So, I've decided to comment on my life a bit and share with everyone where God has been leading me. May God bless you through this!


As days go by, I realize that God is taking my gifting’s and moulding them in ways that I never thought and places I never thought of. There are vast open doors that God is leading my heart through for the future. I can’t wait to jump in and be lavished, not by money, people or things, but by the simplicity of God’s abundance in His one on one ministry. Every day I am starting from today for the future; learning how to be the soaking sponge of Christ pouring over His mercies. The One love I have in this world truly comes down to Him and the hopes of His heart for His children. My soul cries out with tears of joy every time I see a soul saved, a fellow brother or sister forgiven, a child given a second chance. All of these, are miracles of God that I will be able to adMINISTER at times no one expects.
I have been through many transitions that, at times, seemed pointless and hopeless. I have shaken my fist at God and even blamed myself for “failures.” The fact is, they were failures because I called them so. My views of these tough transitions have changed drastically. They continue to change from moment to moment, day to day, and month to month. All of these circumstances are God’s leverage. And when I think of leverage, I have a vision of this huge caveman boulder with a smaller boulder in front to hold it in place. God is standing ready with a huge stick wedged underneath the boulder. At a moment when no one expects it, He uses the right leverage to get it moving. Like in the Godzilla movies, everyone is running from the boulder because they are afraid. I believe that boulder is God’s metaphor for me. When I am obedient and faithful to His purposes, not matter how simple the task, I can be the one to IMPACT (a bad joke – har, har) people with the gifts that He has given me – even when they are afraid of it. God is consistently giving me leverage and preparation for the future. A curse is a curse if you make it; A gift is a curse if you make it. Make a curse a gift when it is given to you. I can live better now that I have begun to develop the ability to admitt that I have been given a pile of dung, accept it, and respond “Now God, what can we do with this pile to make it smell pretty.” God never gives us something He knows we can’t handle.

Many times I have been given visions and prophecies by total strangers that I am like a “puzzle that can’t find it’s missing piece” (Coldplay’s song “Talk” explains all of what I feel about this and is another unexpected summary of the prophecies). Each day I feel that missing piece in the puzzle is drawing closer in God’s hand. I don’t feel so uneasy that people object that I’m doing and believing in things that others haven’t done or said within the circle of my friends and family. I’m not up to doing the ordinary, I’m up to doing what is ordinary to God. Although this is so cliché, don’t ever let anyone tell you that you can’t do something that may be out of the box. I have battled many times with the fact that the people closest to me can be the worst supporters. Every where you go, every one will have a great idea for your life. The fact of the matter is, that God has a BETTER idea for your life. Surround yourself with mentors and people that you can take faith queue’s from. I have been blessed to have mentors that I am able to share my life with and vice versa. Although I haven’t always listened to them at first, trust me, their God-given wisdom WILL come into place when you need it the most.

Some of you may have no idea where God is leading you in His purpose. If you are one of those people, look at the things that God pulls your heart strings with, the things that don’t shock you but shock others, your blossoming hopes and dreams, your convictions, etc. I thank God that he has confirmed for me ever since I was 10, without a doubt, what direction he wants me to head in. There is no question I am meant to be a psychologist in ministry. Signs of confirmation stare at me when I look at horrible Romanian slums and I am not shocked, but encouraged that there is hope and that God can prepare me to be one of those people who builds up the next generation for God. I want to be amongst the most humble means so that I can understand the wealth of God’s power. I am being prepared to be a person who ministers within the “weathly” Christian community, the prostitutes, the bums, the alcoholics, the drug addicts, the orphaned and abandoned children, the single-parents, the diseased, the wife-beaters, the street people, the shirt and ties, and the blue collard. I am a person born to bring out controversy for righteousness and to bring the wisdom, grace, and love of God to whom ever it may be. This is my calling.

In this whole process, I am praying that I am strong enough to let God hack off my rough edges (Those who are close, please be patient with me). I am also praying that God continues to give me the discretion that I need to know when the time comes to get up and run. I am always called as a Saint, but sometimes a stand-by status is needed.One major lesson I am learning is that THINGS and PEOPLE will NEVER complete who I am. In all objectivity, I don’t NEED my family and their approval, I don’t NEED a guy to make me feel unique and special, I don’t NEED money, I don’t NEED my education and dream of England, I don’t NEED my house, my car, my guitar, my computer, my cds, and everything else. It may sound harsh but the bare truth = ALL I NEED IS CHRIST. He makes me complete and has all the abundance in His kingdom for me, NOT in the world. If you feel yourself saying that statement and then in your heart you hear a “but…” then you know you need a re-evaluation. I know I did. It’s a risky life to live by this statement. Are you up to it? Are you up to what’s ordinary to God?

When the time comes, I will be ready to leave my extra traveler’s bag behind, my extra coat, my extra sandals, and my walking stick (Matt 10:9-14).

Until then I say…

I am Called. I am Chosen. I am a Child of God. I am boldly Natalie Steele.

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